(Right to left: Raven, Scribe, Natalie, Bish, and Janae)

Dragon*Con 2011 was excellent. True, we ended up going through the same hurricane three times, but fighting the forces of nature, the crowds, and the clock were all worth those fabulous four days of science-fiction and fantasy fandom overload! It was our first time going to D*C, and by the time it was over, I think we had finally worked out all the twists and turns and directions.

I was rather disappointed in the Writing Track, but that post is for another time. Without further ado:

Ten Things I Learned At Dragon Con

1. "Bollocks" may be similar to "bullshit" in usage, but it means "balls" by definition. Is it sad that I knew the latter, but not the former? Also, it is not pronounced: "bullocks", which brings to mind the following image:

2. Starlings are awesome and freakish, like sky-bound sea creatures.

3. No one bats an eye if you change in a parking lot (no photo available)

4. Raven, Skrybbi, and I are predictable.

You see, this is the first big convention we've been to where the main hotel had a really, really big bar. On Saturday evening, we hung out there with David B Coe, AJ Hartley, and Edmund Schubert of Magical Words Blog and "How to Write Magical Words" renown. On Sunday night, we had invited David and AJ (and the lovely Faith Hunter and Misty Massey) to join us at the Yule Ball...

...which turned out to be a complete waste of time. We dressed up, we stood in line, we got in, and there was nothing but bad music and people standing around. Also: no booze, which is a necessity if we're going to A) Enjoy our vacation time properly B) Get Skrybbi to dance and C) ENJOY OUR VACATION TIME PROPERLY.

So we left.

Unfortunately, cell phone reception kind of sucks, and poor AJ also found himself at the Yule Ball. Yeah, we accidentally stood him up. Somehow, with his "character analysis senses" tingling, or perhaps with a tip of the hat to writer-tropes, AJ went to the same bar we'd been at the night before. Not only the same bar, however--he went to the same table. And guess who was there.

Oh yes.

Us.

5. Never trust the dealing of playing cards to AJ Hartley

You will end up with an entire hand comprised of sevens and twos. *shakes fist*

As well as being skilled with
hilarious text messages, Ed
is awesome at putting up with
drunken short people.

6. Always trust your cell-phone to Edmund Schubert
When your friend wants to know when he needs to come find you to go back to the place you're all staying, Ed's responses will be much funnier (and probably more coherent) than your own.

7. Battlestar Galactica people fracking ROCK

8. Fezzes are cool

9. SOUP SAVES

Skrybbi made FOUR containers of frozen soup before we left for Dragon*Con (two chicken, two lentil), and they stayed frozen at my feet for all seven hours it took us to drive to Atlanta. After all the time at the bar, hot soup and hand-torn chunks of Stuart's beer-bread was the perfect dinner...and breakfast.

10. Cargo pants can fit 2 sodas, an apple, 2 bottles of beer, a wallet, a cell phone, keys, and a camera. Seriously, why can't ALL my costumes have military-issue cargo pants?

REPORT: What are some things you learned at conventions? What advice do YOU have for con-goers? What are some of your hilarious stories from con?